I trialled the free tiers only on this, and it clarified a lot. Where it actually landed was how the app handles reports — that matters far more in smaller places.

I ran this for a couple of months while comparing them, so the sample is at least reasonable. Looking back, moderation quality shapes the first fortnight more than anything. It stood out without exception regardless of how I framed the profile. Your mileage may differ ultimately, rather than taking my word for it.

The short list of what mattered:

  • How the onboarding handles preferences — worth two minutes before you commit.
  • Ask how much profile depth the format allows — genuinely worth knowing up front.
  • How the app behaves after a fortnight away — most apps are quiet about this.
  • How the app handles people who never reply — surprisingly hard to find out in advance.
  • How long before the first upsell prompt appears — worth two minutes before you commit.

I checked this against my own numbers over a few months, before I was willing to recommend anything. Strip out the noise and how the app handles reports predicts your reply rate better than anything else.