I asked around before drawing any conclusion here, rather than just skimming a couple of apps. If I had to pick one factor, photo quality on both sides is what people are really complaining about.

I paid attention to the details this time in my own time, which is where the interesting part started. For me, how the app handles reports tends to decide whether you stick with it. That held more than once whether the app was well known or not. It cost me nothing to verify frankly, the detail varies a lot by city.

I sat with this question for a while in my own time, before I trusted my own conclusion. The measurable difference came down to how much the interface pushes a subscription, which is the part the marketing never mentions. The result repeated fairly clearly on both the free and the paid side. Whether it generalises I do not know really, depending on where you are.

The signals I now look for first:

  • Find out how obvious it is when someone has stopped using the app — most apps are quiet about this.
  • Whether notifications can be tuned — this is the one I would check first.
  • Look at how many prompts the profile format offers — most apps are quiet about this.
  • Check whether a paid feature interrupts the conversation — this is where the free tiers diverge.

I looked at this from a few angles a while back, which took the guesswork out of it. Whichever option you pick, moderation quality decides most of the outcome.