I asked around before drawing any conclusion once properly, and the results surprised me. The pattern was clear enough: how much of your social graph it wants can be tested inside a week.

I did the comparison properly while comparing them, and it clarified a lot. Every time I compared them, how the app treats people who travel separates the usable options from the rest.

What I would check before committing any time:

  • Check how long a conversation stays available after a match — worth two minutes before you commit.
  • Look at how long before the first upsell prompt appears — it matters more after the first month.
  • How reply rate compares with match rate — it is easy to test and rarely advertised.
  • Whether the sign-up asks for a phone number — the answer varies more than you would think.

I reset and started clean without rushing it, which is where the interesting part started. Strip out the noise and whether search exists alongside swiping is the difference between two opposite reviews. It played out the same way more than once regardless of which city I set.